Dabbling with Protestants

Part 2 in 5 Part Series
In college, I tried joining a very interesting and modern protestant church with a very pious (and very decent) group of guys.  I enjoyed the singing, the guitar playing, and the camaraderie, but a particular event convinced me I was in the wrong the place.  I was camping with the group on a very fun expedition into the wilderness, and I was willing to go along with the game, simply proclaim Jesus your savior and you get a free pass to heaven?  Answers don't get easier than that.  Sign me up. 

Everything was going great until I asked our preacher a question about reconciling the Gospel of John with the other gospels on a host of details regarding Jesus' trip to Jerusalem, and he replied in an overtly patronizing tone:

Him: 'There's no contradiction.' 
Me: 'But why are all the details about the resurrection different in all four gospels?' (and this is where it gets good.)
Him: 'Have you studied the bible for years?  Have you had expert training by theologists?'
Me: 'No.'  At this point I naively have no idea why he is asking this.
Him: 'Then you need to trust me, because I've studied the gospels, and I know that there are no contradictions.  Only a novice would think there are inconsistencies.'
Me: Speechless. 

Apparently my reading skills needed some serious work.  Genesis was riddled with things only experts could understand.  How many animals of each kind on the arc?  Read Genesis 7:2 7:8-9, can preachers count?  Were beasts created first or man?  Gen 1:25-6 and Gen 2:18-9 have some confusing words from the omnipotent.  And the list goes on and on.  I'll admit that I only read the 4 Gospels and Genesis with a critical eye, but that was more than enough. 

I was a weak person then, and I went ahead with the Baptism (a person with no sense of self really enjoys being the center of attention, even for a short while).  But even then I knew it was all a farce, I had no genuine feelings for the ceremony, and reason gnawed at me like a ravenous worm inside an overripe apple.  It whispered sarcastically:  Apparently common sense and understanding the words written in the bible isn't enough to understand the bible.  You must be a self-proclaimed expert, taught by other self-proclaimed experts with a clearly identifiable agenda of promoting their own preconceived notions and biases.  You must suspend all that you thought you knew about reason and contradiction and believe what someone tells you to believe solely because they are so convinced of their own righteousness.  Though I really liked the people, I drifted away from that group shortly afterwards. 

Thus ended my religiosity.